What Now?
5 years ago
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Can't catch a break!
Now the problem is with the fire inspection. The agency misplaced the report but luckily the fire inspector has a copy. She faxed it to me yesterday (very quick return call, very prompt fax) but our fax machine has a phantom paper jam. I called her just now and asked if she could please re-fax it to my boss' fax number, at which point she said she wasn't sure where it was. Yikes! Nevertheless, I'm hopeful that it can't have gone too far in the last 24 hours.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Public Service Announcement
Shopping!
I definitely should not be confessing this to the blogosphere, but as I'm taking pains to be unidentifiable... I'm planning to take a not-really-sick day tomorrow (today, technically) to run some errands and apply for a few jobs. One of the errands is to look for new dinnerware. And here we get, at last, to a connection to the underlying theme of this blog: observant Judaism.
It's an expensive proposition to set up a kitchen, and even more so when your mother insists that you buy high-quality everything (she worked at a high-end kitchen store when I set up my kitchen, got an employee discount, ...), and even more than that when you need to buy two (or three) of everything for kashrut purposes. So when I first needed dinnerware, I bought the least expensive stuff I could find--clear glass plates and bowls that came in a set of 12 each for, I kid you not, only $10. To be honest, I truly hoped that I would meet my husband, he would ask to be my husband, and we would end up with nicer plates that we chose together. That hasn't happened, and it's been nearly eight years. Somehow, I still have 12 dinner plates and 12 dessert plates. They are not all completely intact, however, and I have only eight bowls.
It seems that it is time to replace my dinnerware.
There are so many choices out there; how ever will I make up my mind? Before I moved last June, I spent hours browsing every website imaginable for dinnerware. But I've come up with the criterion that will make my decision easier: the plates must involve the color blue in some way. Because, you see, these are to be my dairy plates. In my effort to make the kitchen user-friendly and kashrut-protected, I am moving towards a completely color-coded system. No, the blender will not get replaced by one that is blue (and a good thing, as I doubt those exist). But it is a lot easier to tell a kiddo to use a blue bowl and a blue spoon for her cereal than it is to explain which bowls are for dairy, and what foods are dairy, and make her connect them.
Off to bed so that I can get a productive day in tomorrow!
It's an expensive proposition to set up a kitchen, and even more so when your mother insists that you buy high-quality everything (she worked at a high-end kitchen store when I set up my kitchen, got an employee discount, ...), and even more than that when you need to buy two (or three) of everything for kashrut purposes. So when I first needed dinnerware, I bought the least expensive stuff I could find--clear glass plates and bowls that came in a set of 12 each for, I kid you not, only $10. To be honest, I truly hoped that I would meet my husband, he would ask to be my husband, and we would end up with nicer plates that we chose together. That hasn't happened, and it's been nearly eight years. Somehow, I still have 12 dinner plates and 12 dessert plates. They are not all completely intact, however, and I have only eight bowls.
It seems that it is time to replace my dinnerware.
There are so many choices out there; how ever will I make up my mind? Before I moved last June, I spent hours browsing every website imaginable for dinnerware. But I've come up with the criterion that will make my decision easier: the plates must involve the color blue in some way. Because, you see, these are to be my dairy plates. In my effort to make the kitchen user-friendly and kashrut-protected, I am moving towards a completely color-coded system. No, the blender will not get replaced by one that is blue (and a good thing, as I doubt those exist). But it is a lot easier to tell a kiddo to use a blue bowl and a blue spoon for her cereal than it is to explain which bowls are for dairy, and what foods are dairy, and make her connect them.
Off to bed so that I can get a productive day in tomorrow!
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Goals for the Summer
I was inspired by Mothering4Money to make a list of my goals for the summer. Obviously the first is get licensed finally. Then, let's see...
Non-kiddo related goals:
Non-kiddo related goals:
- find new job
- reduce dependence on caffeine
- wash dishes within a day of using them
- eat more salad and less pasta
Kiddo-related goals:
- do lots of coloring/painting/crafts
- take lots of photos
- keep a journal
- go to free concerts
Happy summer!
Monday, June 22, 2009
Differential Response
At my office staff meeting last week, my boss mentioned that he was going to a meeting hosted by our child welfare agency about Differential Response. It made more sense for one of my co-workers to go with him, but he knows that I'm interested in child welfare, so he offered me the opportunity to go. I pointed out that it would just be for my own personal enrichment, and that my going wouldn't really add value to the office, but I still got to go.
It was definitely interesting to learn about Differential Response and the benefits that it can have for kids and families (even though from a short-term resource usage perspective, it looks like it potentially could require a realignment of agency resources as well as a diversion of resources from other families that don't have hotline calls about them). And then because I'm picky about things like this, it was interesting to see that the Agency Director had written out his introductory remarks, even though he was speaking only to other agency directors. I could tell that he was reading his remarks.
Most interesting, however, were the data. Agency Director provided May's CPS data. I left my notes at work, so this is approximate, but that's better so that you can't find me. (This is why I didn't earlier post the exact number of licensed foster homes in my jurisdiction. I'd learned it from the newspaper, so you could easily figure it out. And I'm super antsy about anonymity, since I don't actually self-censor very well.) In May, there were over 1000 hotline calls. More than 600 of those were investigated. I don't recall how many of the 600 were substantiated. 330-some were neglect cases. This was all very overwhelming for me, as I realized how many investigators there must be in CPS, but also as I realized that there are more substantiated abuse and neglect cases each month than there are licensed foster homes in my Big City. Obviously not all substantiated cases result in out of home placement. Still. That's a LOT of abuse and neglect. I'm hopeful that implementing Differential Response will help families more than the current system.
It was definitely interesting to learn about Differential Response and the benefits that it can have for kids and families (even though from a short-term resource usage perspective, it looks like it potentially could require a realignment of agency resources as well as a diversion of resources from other families that don't have hotline calls about them). And then because I'm picky about things like this, it was interesting to see that the Agency Director had written out his introductory remarks, even though he was speaking only to other agency directors. I could tell that he was reading his remarks.
Most interesting, however, were the data. Agency Director provided May's CPS data. I left my notes at work, so this is approximate, but that's better so that you can't find me. (This is why I didn't earlier post the exact number of licensed foster homes in my jurisdiction. I'd learned it from the newspaper, so you could easily figure it out. And I'm super antsy about anonymity, since I don't actually self-censor very well.) In May, there were over 1000 hotline calls. More than 600 of those were investigated. I don't recall how many of the 600 were substantiated. 330-some were neglect cases. This was all very overwhelming for me, as I realized how many investigators there must be in CPS, but also as I realized that there are more substantiated abuse and neglect cases each month than there are licensed foster homes in my Big City. Obviously not all substantiated cases result in out of home placement. Still. That's a LOT of abuse and neglect. I'm hopeful that implementing Differential Response will help families more than the current system.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Foster vs adoption licensing
Hello all out there in blog-land! I got a message from a friend this morning asking for some assistance with a project that she is doing at work, and you have additional knowledge that you can share.
The background: She is (I think a social worker, I'm clearly not as good a friend as I should be, and now would be too embarrassed to ask her what she does for a living) in Israel, and the licensing rules there for foster parenting are different than for adoption. For adoption, the parents have to have a certain income level, a minimum age gap between the parents and the kids, they might need to be married (guessing from her email), have a minimum education level, and there's a limit on how many kids they can adopt. Just as examples.
She wants to know if, in the various jurisdictions in the States, the process and rules are the same or different, and specifics. (Actually her question to me was only if they are identical and if I knew if it was the same in other states, but I imagine that a simple yes or no answer is not actually what she's looking for.)
I would love to compile information from all of you to pass along to her. If you could post information in the comments, that would be great, or if you have a lot to say and/or want to be able to say what state you live in without that being public for the world to see, you can email me at FrumFosterMom - at - gmail - dot - com.
Thanks!!
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Done!
Home study was this afternoon, though the licensing worker needs to come back a second time per the regulations. I totally could have lied about: 1. having a landline. 2. securing all of my household cleaners. 3. securing my medications.
Some reflections.
First, the appointment was at 2. At 2:09 (I can be precise because this is what my cell phone tells me) she called to tell me that she got lost. I gave her directions from where she was: "follow the road you're on and turn right on my street." At 2:36 she called again. Still lost. A little more complicated this time, as she was going the wrong way on my street, and for a few blocks (where she was), it is one-way. I try to give her directions but she wouldn't let me give them. She asked if there was anywhere to park and she would walk. I told her that she could park on the street, but if she drove to my building, there is a parking lot. At 3 pm she finally arrives. If she had only taken public transportation, she would have saved an hour of her time, an hour of my time, an hour of gas usage, and the stress that she then didn't know how to get back to her office. As I griped about this on facebook, it occurred to me that she could be testing me: "If you can maintain your patience as I call you repeatedly from five blocks away from your apartment but can't figure out how to get there, then you have the temperament to be a foster parent."
Then, she asked a lot of questions that (were completely appropriate and I wouldn't have minded answering them but) I had answered all of them previously in my mountains of paperwork. And much to my surprise, she had actually reviewed the paperwork before she came out to my home. So unless she wanted to see if my answers were consistent, it was a waste of time. And I just don't have answers to some of the questions. I remember that my mom made things miserable while I was growing up. I don't remember details. More questions are not going to help retrieve memories. And no, it isn't that "some things are difficult to talk about."
My ONE inept moment when I handed over an original (apparently, as I can't find my copy)? They lost it. It's the fire inspection report, too, which means that I can't just easily recreate it on my own. Crud. Other paperwork that they still need: dates of my various previous employment experiences, progress reports from my psychiatrist and therapist (because my MD's consultation with the psych was apparently not sufficient), and my very favorite--the name of a day care center near my apartment. This last is "proof" that I've considered the need for day care and know how to find it. They don't have to have any openings, I don't have to send the kiddo there, nothing like that. No, I just have to go through the exercise of identifying a day care center. That should be easy enough.
So it's just paperwork, a trip to Home Depot to get window locking things, and another visit. Maybe by Thanksgiving. :-)
Some reflections.
First, the appointment was at 2. At 2:09 (I can be precise because this is what my cell phone tells me) she called to tell me that she got lost. I gave her directions from where she was: "follow the road you're on and turn right on my street." At 2:36 she called again. Still lost. A little more complicated this time, as she was going the wrong way on my street, and for a few blocks (where she was), it is one-way. I try to give her directions but she wouldn't let me give them. She asked if there was anywhere to park and she would walk. I told her that she could park on the street, but if she drove to my building, there is a parking lot. At 3 pm she finally arrives. If she had only taken public transportation, she would have saved an hour of her time, an hour of my time, an hour of gas usage, and the stress that she then didn't know how to get back to her office. As I griped about this on facebook, it occurred to me that she could be testing me: "If you can maintain your patience as I call you repeatedly from five blocks away from your apartment but can't figure out how to get there, then you have the temperament to be a foster parent."
Then, she asked a lot of questions that (were completely appropriate and I wouldn't have minded answering them but) I had answered all of them previously in my mountains of paperwork. And much to my surprise, she had actually reviewed the paperwork before she came out to my home. So unless she wanted to see if my answers were consistent, it was a waste of time. And I just don't have answers to some of the questions. I remember that my mom made things miserable while I was growing up. I don't remember details. More questions are not going to help retrieve memories. And no, it isn't that "some things are difficult to talk about."
My ONE inept moment when I handed over an original (apparently, as I can't find my copy)? They lost it. It's the fire inspection report, too, which means that I can't just easily recreate it on my own. Crud. Other paperwork that they still need: dates of my various previous employment experiences, progress reports from my psychiatrist and therapist (because my MD's consultation with the psych was apparently not sufficient), and my very favorite--the name of a day care center near my apartment. This last is "proof" that I've considered the need for day care and know how to find it. They don't have to have any openings, I don't have to send the kiddo there, nothing like that. No, I just have to go through the exercise of identifying a day care center. That should be easy enough.
So it's just paperwork, a trip to Home Depot to get window locking things, and another visit. Maybe by Thanksgiving. :-)
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