Thursday, December 3, 2009

The first (almost) two weeks

Since Sabrina came to live with me, I have been writing voluminous facebook status updates for the benefit of my friends, who don't know about this blog. (Except for two--George, who we've talked about, and now another friend who said "you should really blog about this" so I decided to trust her discretion.)

I can't leave Sabrina's room until she is asleep (thank goodness for a moderately quiet keyboard) so I thought that I would just copy all of the relevant updates so that you can see all of the craziness around here in the real-time snippets that are more authentic than the processed posts of the blog. [Note: I did all the copying and pasting last night; but didn't finish the formatting 'til tonight. And some of that is still screwy. Apologies.]

November 19
  • [Foster Ima]'s apartment is not ready for a four year old. Neither is she.

  • Ack, she's here! Freaking out just a bit.

  • Ack, does anyone in the building have some non-spoiled milk that the little one can use on her cereal tomorrow morning?

  • Okay, time to try to move the little one from where she decided to sleep (at the dining room table) to the bedroom.

  • [Foster Ima] is so grateful to have such wonderful friends. Thanks for all of the well wishes. Tonight went okay; now to tackle tomorrow!

  • Wow, haven't been this attuned to thunder in quite some time! But the little one seems to be sleeping through it.

  • [Foster Ima] seems to have ended up with a 4 year old taking up her (Foster Ima's) entire bed. Maybe Foster Ima will sleep in the little one's room.

November 20
  • Haven't been up this side of sunrise in a long while [6:25 am]. Not sure what the little one is going to wear to school today, since she slept in her clothes.

[That's it; remember the 8-9 hours at the hospital?]

November 21

  • Anyone in [my Big City] available for some serious maternal support tonight? Pref. someone with the swine flu vaccine who can come over to help force-medicate a defiant but otherwise adorable 4 year old?

  • [Foster Ima] is very grateful to [Pediatrician Friend] and the other doctors and nurses at [hospital] for helping the little one yesterday, and for helping to keep us occupied since one of us had no expectation of being there for eight hours; and to [neighbors] for watching the little one while I brought our things in from the car and then for bringing me Shabbat dinner.

  • In this moment's installment of "what did I do to deserve such wonderful friends?", I thank [friend] who not only got the little one to take her medicine, but also got her to put on her pajamas and sleep in her own room.

  • [Foster Ima] took some grown-up cough syrup and has a new appreciation for her little one's displeasure at all her medicines. That stuff was NASTY.

  • [Foster Ima] thinks she is glad that the Barbie DVD didn't actually arrive despite Netflix's email, and hopes not to feel the need to smooth things over with television tomorrow.

November 22

  • Crud, I just discovered that my bathtub doesn't have the plug for the drain so a bath is going to be, well, impossible this morning. I guess we'll have to stop somewhere today to buy one, and take a bath tonight.

  • Four year old: "Who?" Me: "Who what?" Four year old: "Who?" Me: "I don't understand what you're asking." Four year old: "Who? Somebody. Somebody. Somebody. Who? I'm not saying it again." Four year old walks out of room.

  • "Stop letting me mess up!"

  • Little one just put my shoes on. What a cutie. :-)

  • Lunch is packed, so time to get ready to go to the zoo. Must remember to let only the little one eat the (dairy) pretzels after the turkey sandwich.

  • "Get that smile off your face!"

  • [Foster Ima] parked the little one in front of her (other) computer to watch Dora streaming on netflix. Not even attempting to engage her in meaningful activity because I feel like death warmed over. It's a good thing I don't get sick often because I'm not a good patient.

November 23
  • Little one is slurping the milk in her cereal. I'm trying hard not to smile or laugh.

  • [Foster Ima] thinks that this never-ending adventure in the bathroom is her own fault for not managing to get vegetables into the little one's stomach.

  • "I'm about to take your patience out of your brain."

  • [Foster Ima] is not a smart mommy. Tried to take little one to school, we were late, nurse said "um, she should stay home all week, didn't the doctor tell you that?"

  • Hooray, found something other than "shereal" and pretzels and cookies that she will eat. Okay, so it's processed fruit in syrup, but it's better than nothing. Plus, she said please and thank you when she asked for more.

  • On fruit cup number 3. Wow.

  • Social worker called at 10:05 to say she would be late to our 10:30 mtg. Mtg was actually supposed to be at 11. Now it's 11:10 and she's still not here.

  • Four year old, scissors, and netbook = not a good combination.

  • On the next shopping list: white bread and tub toys. Also, sponges to replace the sponges appropriated for makeshift tub toys.

  • Rainy day, sick four year old, lots of stuffed animals and Dora = comfort.

  • Aha, a vegetable! In her mouth!

  • [Foster Ima] is thinking back on this morning and hoping that the mom who didn't know her little boy's teacher's name was also a new foster mom.

  • Dinner advice for a picky 4 year old who doesn't like pizza or lasagna, when the chicken in the freezer is 1. still in the freezer and 2. probably freezer-burnt?

  • Really annoyed with [Agency]. Per SW instruction, didn't make follow up appt today so that family could make appt. Now, little one not going to dad's (yet?) and SW didn't call with doc's name and number until after the office was closed for the day.

  • I keep forgetting not to smile.

  • Better for her to call her mom while crying for her, or should I wait until she calms down? I prefer to wait but don't want her think I was withholding information (that I have the number) from her. She's smart enough to realize that.

  • Getting better at using correct English. Specifically, "drawers" instead of "underpants."

  • Another thing to add to the shopping list: toy dishes.

  • [Foster Ima] had grown-up food for dinner while the little one had strawberry yogurt. She wanted to try my dinner and made a face. Good thing I didn't expect her to eat it!

  • Non-dangerous natural consequences: if you spread yogurt on the play doh, it will have to go in the trash, and then you will no longer have your favorite colors of play doh.

  • Lesson: when washing clothes worn by someone else, Check. The. Pockets. Thankfully, this was not a disaster. At least not this time.

November 24
  • Oh the joys of trying to make an appointment at a free clinic.

  • Nice, she just closed the door to her room for the first time. I'd rather know that she's getting dressed, but I'm super pleased that she's comfortable enough to be by herself.

  • I just had a hand put in my face while the little one said, and I quote, "blah blah blah blah blah."

  • Shameless request for assistance: our shopping trip was aborted due to a tantrum. Can anyone do a quick grocery run for me so that we don't starve?

  • Learned today that "drats" is a curse word. Oops. I guess that means that when I thought she was saying "s***" this morning, maybe she wasn't?

  • Okay, so she doesn't like peanut butter but likes half-sour pickles?

  • This little one eats more mayonnaise than anyone ever ought to. But when I was her age, I ate ketchup the same way.

  • How does a 4 year old have such a totally snotty attitude already? It's not the things she's saying that bother me, it's the tone of voice. I'm worried that it's my white, middle-upper class upbringing.

  • Little one on the phone with Mom.

  • No wonder going to bed at 8 has been a problem. I asked Mom what bedtime is, and she said "oh, by 10 she should be going to sleep." Woah.

  • Wow. Was just smacked in the face.

  • [Foster Ima] just put the little one back to bed. Thank you to everyone for your words of wisdom during today's trials.

November 25
  • The little one is a girl after my own heart. I asked what she wanted for breakfast this morning, and she said "yoodles. basketti yoodles. with sauce."

  • I'm starting to be able to speak 4 year old, but sometimes just have no clue. I also learned last night that "What's up?" is something to be said only to boys.

  • Suddenly I have a much greater appreciation for what my parents put up with when I was 4.

  • Apparently Swiper is hanging out in my apartment. Will he go with the little one to visit her daddy tonight?

  • The little one is definitely loved by her family but I'm a little nervous. They came to pick her up without a booster seat and dad didn't seem concerned about the instructions for her medication.

  • I think I'm officially a snob. Looking online to get more school clothes for the little one and am very tempted to pay 3 times as much to get nice uniforms from Lands End instead of polyester crap from the uniform companies.

  • It is really inappropriate that there is a special category "girls' skinny jeans" on the target website.

  • At the library yesterday checked out "My Father's House." Thought it would be good preparation for the little one. Turns out "My Father" is the one who "art in Heaven." Oops.

November 29
  • Three hours 'til I go to pick up the little one. Still many chores to do. So I'm on facebook.

  • Snack, then off to pick up the little one!

  • The little one is chomping on gum. Is gum really appropriate for a four year old?!

  • Little one has no grasp of possessive nouns. When I ask "is it at your Daddy's?" she says "I don't have two daddies. It's at my Daddy house."

  • That was a very long three hours. Now we'll see how long she stays in bed.

November 30
  • About to get the little one out of bed. Maybe with an hour and a half to get ready, she won't be late to school.

  • Pondering how long to let the little one play with her cereal before I take it away from her. An hour in to the hour and a half plan, and she's eaten about four bites of cereal. Next up: medicine, so I can make good on the threat to take her to school in her pajamas if she's not ready on time.

  • 20 minutes to get from the apartment to buckled in the car. 10 minutes from parking at school to out of the car. Must. Make. Rewards. Chart.

  • Tried very, very hard to avoid going back to Target. However, I was *completely* unsuccessful. Having lunch first; must fortify myself.

  • Parents of 4 year olds: how long is reasonable for the little one to spend doing each of the following--breakfast, brushing teeth/washing face, getting dressed?

  • Not giving in. Especially now that she is crying. What do YOU think? She stuck her tongue out at me three times, hid from me, listened to zero things I said, and took an hour to get from the car to the apartment. Should she get to watch a movie? I think not.

  • Got a prepaid cell phone so the little one's mom can call, but I can't get the back cover off to put the battery in.

  • Oh, so mom gives in to her every desire because crying is bad for her asthma. No wonder she won't listen to me.

  • Didn't make rewards chart. Hopefully tomorrow.

December 1
  • If nothing else, the pictures and timer got her out of bed, with brushed teeth, and dressed in a half hour. Still working on breakfast.

  • Today's lesson from the four year old: white people speak English. brown people speak "oosha."

  • "Don't say 'thank you!'"

  • Oops, bad idea to offer yoodles and sauce if there is no sauce in the house.

  • "Santa Claus doesn't know where I'm is" -- oh, heartbreaking!

  • Google image search for homework--ALL the kids are white. (Okay, I've only looked at the first page of results. But still...)

  • I bought the little one ice cream sandwiches, but so far she doesn't even know about them, and I've had three.

  • [Foster Ima] would have loved to see [high school friend] and [her band] this Thursday, but doesn't think it would be fair to leave the little one with a babysitter.

December 2

  • My apartment smells like a febreze factory. Oh well, the little one might not understand natural consequences, but now I do! What a mistake buying that was.

  • Pictures not working this morning. Crud.

  • She took my to-do list. How am I to know what I need to do today?

  • Hoping that the little one's teacher will have some ideas for how to get the little one from the apartment to the car in less than a half hour, but teacher does say that little one never got to school on time with her mommy, either.

  • Head hurts from earlier contact with door; just got lectured by little one's mom on parenting; does someone want to come and give me a hand tonight?

  • Good thing I don't have an actual ice pack since the little one refuses to keep the frozen vegetables wrapped in a towel.

  • The little one has ended up with a speaking toy in bed with her. Problem?


  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  2. Oops, once again I was foiled by word verification.

    I just wanted you to know this is the frum soon-to-be-foster-parent who's been commenting on your posts. I am starting my own foster care blog so I changed accounts.

    Sounds like you're still on quite the ride with ms. Sabrina!

  3. Just checkin in cause we haven't heard from you in a few days - I hope Sabrina doesn't have you tied to a chair in your apartment... ;)

  4. I'll update tomorrow, likely. She was with her dad from Friday 'til today, so there wasn't anything to write about! Now I'm waiting for her to fall back asleep so I can go to bed (typing without glasses on...interesting) so in a sense she does have me tied to a chair :-)